Tuesday, March 29, 2011

Shout, shout, let it all out!

Some of you may know me, some of you may not-but if you're here, you're family. This blog is my release, my unedited version of myself, and my daughter.

Laila was diagnosed just days after her 5th birthday with Type 1 Diabetes, to everyone's surprised. We had her checked for mono, only to find out hours later she would be spending the night in PICU, and three additional nights at the hospital. To say I was shocked wouldn't quite cover my reaction, but what do you do in a situation like that? You persevere.

The life I live is difficult, but the rewards I reap are beautiful. They say a mother's job is never done, but type 1 diabetes brings that to an entirely different level. Until September, I'd held puke bowls, dried tears, and changed diapers; now, I've spent days administering insulin, counting carbohydrates, and endlessly reading articles about topics I never imagined myself having an interest in. I've spent nights checking sugars every two hours, I've held my daughter's hand when she's scared of a needle, and I've cried myself to sleep, feeling entirely and completely defeated.

It has been now six months since Laila's diagnosis, and it's been a bumpy ride. The medical terms I hear myself say are still foreign, even though it seems as though I've been doing this for a lifetime. The single tear that rolls down her cheek or sharp breath she takes with each painful injection still burdens my heart, but I tell myself it'll get better. We've made it this far, there's no stopping us now. Together, we are a team, a unit, a pair. She is not just a child with type 1 diabetes, she is Laila. And I am not just anyone, I am her mom.

5 comments:

  1. SO BEAUTIFUL! You are an amazing inspiration and I hope this blog helps YOU and others! I hope you don't mind I shared your link with a friend of mine who's been "in the fight" with her son for quite some time.

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  2. You always have such a beautiful way with your thoughts and words! I love it and love you!

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  3. I have to say Laila is the sweetest bravest little girl ever. The other night when I gave her shot to her and she gave me the thumbs up. It just made me smile to see wow this little girl just said I didn't hurt her. Even if I did she made it seem like I didn't. I am so glad I have you and your children in my life.

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  4. Oh Joli, this is a fabulous idea! I just love it. You wrote with so much emotion. I have a few challenges myself with my boys and I can totally relate. I know that I dont have to stick them with needles or watch their food intake but I kind of fell into your role when i read what you wrote ... just simply great! I cant wait to read more!

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  5. Joli & Laila - I love your new blog!
    Laila, you will be an amazing role model to so many other kids and even other adults sharing your courage and positive outlook. Joli, even though our situations are different in diagnosis, I understand too what its like to be a parent and the shock of being told of a diagnosis for your child that will effect the rest of your family's lives.
    But you are both strong and will persevere over any obstacles that are thrown at you. Thank you for sharing.

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